We all screw up. Either because we only took our eye off the ball for a split second, or maybe it’s just because we’re selfish idiots who should know better but don’t. Either way saying sorry can be a bit hit and miss so how does saying sorry the Kennedy way sound?
According to the boffins at Baylor (university in America), apology is all about restitution, empathy and forgiveness. So here we go again – boffins (great word guys) explaining the obvious with slightly less obvious words. Still, if you gotta bring home the bacon – now, where were we……
Oh yes…perhaps it’s not so obvious as it might seem. The B A B (go on – work it out) tell us that true forgiveness, the sort that results in…let’s not go there….is really dependent on as wide a variety of ways of showing contrition as possible. What they said was that restitution alone may not be enough. Look at it another way, paying for a broken greenhouse glass window may not be enough to earn next doors forgiveness if you’ve ruined their chances at the local vegetable grower’s competition. It’s pretty much the same as thinking that a bunch of flowers to say sorry I forgot is just what you’d have provided on their birthday anyway.
You gotta show that restitution in a number of ways. Move on from the things that cost money to the things that cost effort – here’s where it starts to get tough fellas (yep – fellas, read this coz the girls already get it). Start to think about what you did, or didn’t do from their perspective. How did you make them feel or think coz that’s what you really need to address. You’ve got to come up with just that little thing that makes them feel you do understand how they felt and then BINGO – proper restitution. See, I said it was getting hard.
Is there a trick to learn? A short cut that’ll help make saying sorry easier? Of course there is, you could always do it the Kennedy way. Oh – now you’re listening…. you’ve got to influence how they’re thinking and get them to see that despite what you did you are genuinely sorry (coz you are boys aren’t ya) and help them come to their senses. Of course you’re sorry – they just need to see that. You can always see exactly how you change the way people think at a Kennedy show, it’s what goes on all the time.
What’s a good way of apologising?